As I have had some time for myself for a change I have realized just how fast and hard I have been going for most of my life. I have been working full-time jobs since I was 14 years old, pursuing education, and chasing success. It seems I have always been looking for the next step that was prescribed and then right in front of me. As I researched this realization I came across the theory of the Hedonistic Hamster Wheel modified by Micaheal Eysenck relating how a person's success in life only gives a fleeting gain to happiness. The research shows “the tendency of humans to quickly return to a relatively stable level of happiness despite major positive or negative events or life changes.” According to this theory, as a person makes more money and/or achieves more “success” the expectations and desires that follow rise in tandem, which results in no permanent gain in happiness.
If we know this, why do we jump on the wheel? Why do hamsters run round and round? Because somebody put them in a cage! Many of us also feel encaged, running on a different wheel, either running to or from what they perceive as happiness or what others tell them is success. I have been blessed to work with many amazing people and projects over the past 30 years. And over the past six years I have been part of some really ground-breaking and remarkable work. However, it has become so real to me that no matter what we designed, built, and/or innovated the next question always was “What’s next” and that the happiness from the work was diminished especially when left for “others” to define. If we consider happiness as a destination or an object we can obtain it will surely elude us.
A great quote that has been rattling around my ponderings from Henry David Thoreau said, “Happiness is like a butterfly; the more you chase it, the more it will elude you, but if you turn your attention to other things, it will come and sit softly on your shoulder.” You definitely won’t catch many butterflies on a hamster wheel.
In one of my favorite books, The Book Of Joy by Nobel Peace Prize Laureates His Holiness the Dalai Lama and Archbishop Desmond Tutu, they speak of happiness vs. joy. They share stories of the great personal and national adversity they have experienced and their personal stories of struggle and renewal. Despite the different perspectives, the idea that holds greater sway is that experiencing happiness depends on external factors. Happiness happens to us. Even though we may seek it, desire it, pursue it, feeling happiness is not a choice we make. Joy, on the other hand, is a choice purposefully made. They also contend that happiness doesn’t bring joy, and joy isn’t the byproduct of happiness. Joy is something grander than happiness. Joy is a fruit of the Spirit, and when we find joy it’s infused with comfort and wrapped in peace. It’s an attitude of the heart.
So, how then do we stay passionate and driven without losing sight of happiness? How do we keep centered on doing good work judged by ourselves while avoiding the hamster wheel trap? Well that’s the hard work. Maybe the famous poem by Helen Steiner Rice can help us on our own journey off the wheel.
Happiness is something we create in our mind,
it’s not something you search for and seldom find.
It’s just waking up and beginning the day,
by counting our blessings and kneeling to pray.
It’s giving up thoughts that breed discontent,
and accepting what comes as a gift “heaven-sent”.
It’s giving up whining for things we have not.
It’s knowing that life is determined for us,
and pursuing our tasks
without fret, fume or fuss.
For it’s by completing
what God gives us to do,
that we find real contentment,
and happiness too.
Helen Steiner Rice
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