What is courage? I think courage is doing something that logic tells you you can’t or shouldn’t do. It takes courage to let go of injuries and wrongdoings or to look past current circumstances toward a positive outcome.
As most of my friends know, I am a fan of Simon Sinek’s writing and research. In his 2019 book The Infinite Game he surmises that Infinite thinkers conceive abundant outcomes with less time spent on what happened. Instead, their effort and energy are focused on what is or is not possible. Sinek asserts that “When we lead with a finite mindset in an infinite game, it leads to all kinds of problems, the most common of which include the decline of trust, cooperation and innovation. Leading with an infinite mindset in an infinite game, in contrast, really does move us in a better direction.” Yet I will say that having an infinite mindset is not always easy. In James Carse’s extraordinary 2013 book Finite and Infinite Games he shares, “Infinite play means a departure from the herd. They are more concerned with positioning themselves to deal effectively with whatever challenges come up. And when leaders courageously forge new paths, try new things, or perhaps create a contrarian response to a crisis, they invite criticism.”
I have spent a lot of time reading and researching Brené Brown's works even receiving my "Dare To Lead" Trainer Certification. Brown who often reminds us, “if courage is a value you hold dear, then criticism will always be an unavoidable consequence.” One of her focal quotes is from former US President, “Colonel” Teddy Roosevelt at the time and his 1910 speech in Paris, France entitled “Citizenship in a Republic.” Brown called this the “quote that changed my life.”
It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs, who comes short again and again, because there is no effort without error and shortcoming; but who does actually strive to do the deeds; who knows great enthusiasms, the great devotions; who spends himself in a worthy cause; who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who neither know victory nor defeat.
As Brown states in Dare to Lead, she finally understood she had been approaching courage and criticism all wrong. She committed to changing the way she thought about the arena:
“Showing up and being seen” is what it’s all about. It’s not about the finite idea of winning or losing. It all starts with entering the arena.
By virtue of being in the arena, the reality is you’re going to “get your ass kicked” from time-to-time. That knowledge creates an opening for fear, doubt, and comparison to creep in. The natural reaction is to “armor up,” yet the infinite game teaches endurance and the growth, learning, and strength that result from going through challenging times.
As it pertains to critics, don’t spend any time listening to those in the cheap seats telling you how they would do it. If you’re not in the arena, “getting your ass kicked alongside me, I’m not interested in your feedback.”
This quote and Brown’s take-aways really resonate with me and encourage me to be proud of just being in the arena. As a school leader this really rings true with so many people ready to share their opinions from the “cheap seats” especially when things are really tough. Courage is showing up in the arena and then doing something that logic tells you you can’t or shouldn’t do.
In difficult times, the stakes only increase. Sinek says, “taking risks for the good especially with an unknown future is not ever the easy path, but almost always the right one.”
So what is courage? It is entering the challenges of life with an infinite mindset and willingness to enter the arena and brave criticism for what is right. It is doing what logic says you can't or don't know how to do. Our world desperately needs more leaders willing to forge forward into the unknown walking into criticism willingly for the good of those around them.
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